MONACO – Calling the course-misdirection debacle at the USATF Half Marathon Championships a “tremendous boon for the sport,” World Athletics has announced September’s Road Running Championships in Copenhagen will adopt a choose-your-own-adventure-style course for the half marathon.
The first of its kind, the course will incorporate a mix of deceptive elements all designed to mislead racers, including an expansive corn maze, a full-scale house of mirrors, and even an escape room in which runners must work together to solve their way out.
“More obstacle course than race course, our innovative ‘choose your own adventure’ course features a variety of elements never before seen in road racing, all designed to give runners total control over their destiny,” said a World Athletics spokesperson. “Along the way, athletes will be forced to make several crucial decisions that will significantly impact how their race unfolds. Mileage will vary based on the paths they choose, as the race prioritizes the experience of each mile over the total distance covered.”
“We are proud to offer a truly well-rounded, comprehensive race: one that tests not only runners’ bodies but also their minds. Throughout the race, they will encounter a variety of twists and turns at every street corner that will keep them guessing until the finish line, if they are fortunate enough to reach it. With this new format, there will be no question as to who the true winner is.”
On March 1 in Atlanta, Jessica McClain, Emma Grace Hurley, and Ednah Kurgat were leading the USATF Half Marathon Championships before being led off course following mile 12, when a police emergency forced course marshals to relocate. They ultimately finished well outside the top three. The incident sparked widespread debate over who was at fault and how to address the situation.
USATF announced last week that World Athletics had granted the federation a one-time “exceptional decision” to admit seven women, including McClain, Hurley, and Kurgat, to compete in the Road Running Championships half marathon, instead of the traditional four. The championships will be held September 19-20.
At press time, sources confirmed World Athletics was considering requiring runners to solve a Rubik’s Cube before crossing the finish line.
- Ted Dreads Honeymoon Abroad — “Where the Hell Will I Run?”
- ESPN Cancels Ill-Advised “First Take” Running Spinoff Show
- Study Finds Energy Gels Provide No Nutritional Value, Entirely Placebo
- Courageous Runner Tempts Fate By Wearing Two Left (L) Socks
- UCAN Sponsors Male Runner After Demonstrating “Elite Virility” in Impregnating Wife
- Company Scraps Carbon Neutral Commitment; Will Emit More CO2
- Derek Calls Night Runs ‘Relaxing,’ Mystified by Concept of Women’s Safety
- Healed Injury Refuses to Quit Being Mitch’s Excuse Not to Run
- Researchers Determine Heel Pull Tabs Serve No Purpose
- Boston Marathon Renames Heartbreak Hill to “One Big Beautiful Hill”
- Game Over: Kyle Convinced Bullpen Entrance Song Gives Him Edge in Race
- Gregory Desperately Trying to Outrun “The Runs” Mid-Run
- Gel Brand Drops Marathoner After Pregnancy Deemed Incompatible With Peak Performance
- D.A.R.E. Out: Schools Use Runner’s High as Drug-Free Strategy
- Mattel Bows to Trump’s Demands With Homoerotic Runner Ken Doll
- Running Warehouse Shutters Operations Following Departure of Its Heart and Soul
- Kevin Refuses to Go Down on Wife During Marathon Training
- Boston Marathon Bans Porta-Potties, Requires Runners to Carry Own Waste
- Running Influencer Shills Self-Confidence Not to Follow Him
- World Athletics Adopts ‘Choose Your Own Adventure’ Course for Road Running Championships
- Boston’s Top American Talbi Reveals He Wore Glasses to Avoid Detection as Contender
- Runner Clearly Only Stopped In Café To Use Restroom, Pretends Otherwise
- Reviews Are In: Kids Running Movie Can’t Go the Distance
- Amid Batshit Prices, Runners Resort to Renting Shoes
- CEO Admits New Running Shoe “Ass”: “We’ve Made it Worse”
- Boston Qualifiers Alarmed by Growing Trend of Charity Runners “Helping Other People”
- Tracksmith and rabbit Unveil Shared Tortoise Logo to Differentiate Brands
- FanDuel Lets You Bet on Amateur Runners—Even Your Daughter
- Brock Furious He Must Finish Current Step Before Taking Next Step
- Researchers Determine Men’s Marathon Record More Impressive Than Cure for Cancer
- Psychopath Runs In Total Silence, Waves Like It’s Normal
- Nike and 41-Year-Old Kipchoge Aim to Shave Entire Hour off Marathon Record
- Diehard Vegan Unknowingly Commits Insect Genocide on Every Run
- Goldendoodle “Winston” Burned Out from Marathon Training
- NYRR Replaces Road Races with Trail Races; Unveils 19+1 Program
- Report: “The Yips” Afflicting Runners at Alarming Rate
- Report: Straight White Male Runner Not Center of Universe
- Company Confuses ‘Biannual,’ Locks Itself Into Double the Shoe Updates
- Teresa Never Experiences Runner’s High with Boyfriend, Continues Faking It
- Tracksmith Sells Singlet for “Losers” Failing to Qualify for Boston
- Dos Equis Introduces the “Most Interesting Runner in the World”
- New Balance Unveils the ‘OUT-AND-BACK,’ Finally Offering Alternative to the ‘TRACK’
- Method Runner Refuses to Break Character When Not Running
- Amateur Runner Self-Imposes 5-Year Ban After Admitting to Creatine Use
- After F1: Drive to Survive Success, Netflix Orders 6 Seasons of “Run to Have Fun”
- Cyclists Demand Inclusion in Nike Ad That Acknowledges Everyone Except Them
- Running Influencer Calls for Inclusive Sport That Excludes Pros
- Road Runner Transitions to Trail Runner—Not Everyone Is an Ally
- Runner Does Same Route in Same Shoes—Refuses to Do Missionary
- LA Marathon Scraps Finisher Medals for Starter Participation Trophies
- Luis Swears He’ll Run Tomorrow—Same Lie as Yesterday
- Guy Unsure When, Why, or How He Became a Runner
- Runner’s World Confirms Shoe Stack Height the New “Penis Size”
- Creep “Flirts” with Crush Solely Using Strava
- “It’s a Wonderful Run” Shows It’s a Miserable Life Without Running
- JD Vance Unveils “F*ck a Couch to 5K” Plan
- Report: ‘Pain Cave’ More Closely Resembles ‘Pain Cavern’
- Runner Finally Comfortable Enough to Drop from 10- to 9-Inch Inseam
- 4/20 Casts Cloud Over Boston Marathon; Spectators Oddly Chill, Runners Compromised
- Archaeologists Unearth Prehistoric Running Shoe Circa 2019
